April 3rd, 2010 by admin

I mean I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure that’s not the best way to win a UFC fight…….

October 11th, 2008 by admin

August 17th, 2008 by admin

July 18th, 2008 by admin

A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple
bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped around his neck.
Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.

“Well,” the man says, “it’s like this; I was playing a quiet round of
golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls
into a pasture of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was
rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white on its
rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there
was a golf ball with my wife’s monogram on it–stuck right in the middle
of the cow’s butt. That’s when I made my big mistake.”

“What did you do?” the doctor asks.

“Well.” the man replies, “I lifted the cow’s tail and yelled to my wife,
‘Hey, this looks like yours!’ I don’t remember much after that.”

June 5th, 2008 by admin

One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, “Sorry, pal. No pets allowed.”
The man replied, “This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you’ll see.”
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.
The guy said, “Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips.” The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
“Wow! That’s one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?” asked the bartender.
The man replied, “I don’t know. I’ve only had him for seven years.”

May 18th, 2008 by admin

May 2nd, 2008 by admin

A teacher asks her students if they’re Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student.
“Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?”
“The Red Sox.”
“Why’s that?”
“Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I’m a Red Sox fan too.”
“That’s not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?”
“No, that would make me a Yankees fan!”

April 24th, 2008 by admin

1: Look at the size of his putter.
2: Oh, dang, my shafts all bent.
3: You really wacked the hell out of that sucker.
4: After 18 holes I can barely walk.
5: My hands are so sweaty I cant get a good grip.
6: Lift your head and spread your legs.
7: You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired.
8: Just turn your back and drop it.
9: Hold up. Ive got to wash my balls.
10: Damn, I missed the hole again.

April 22nd, 2008 by admin

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game.They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game he asked her how she liked her first football game experience.

“Oh, I really liked it,” she replied “especially the tight pants and all those big muscles! Wow! But I just can’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”

Dumbfounded, and scratching his head her date asked, “What do you mean, ‘over 25 cents’?”

“Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like…Helloooooo? It’s only 25 cents!!!!”!’”

April 5th, 2008 by admin