March 31st, 2008 by admin
- What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig?
A teddy boar!
- Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet?
It lives on ice!
- What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot?
A carrot!
- What animal do you look like when you get into the bath?
A little bear!
- What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool?
She had mittens!
- What do cat actors say on stage?
Tabby or not tabby!
- Why are rabbits just like calculators?
Because they always multiply.
- What holiday do dogs like best?
Howl-a-ween.
- How do you catch a unique rabbit?
You ‘neak up on it.
- Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
- Why did the chicken cross the beach?
To get to the other tide.
March 31st, 2008 by admin
- How long does it take for a gymnast to get to class?
A split second!
- Why is the math book so unhappy?
Because it’s full of problems!
- What word is always spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly!
- What state do pencils come from?
Pencil-vania!
- What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
You’re looking sharp!
- What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my eye on you!
- What is a snake’s favorite subject?
Hiss-tory!
- Why did the boy eat his homework?
Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
- Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9!
- How do bees get to school?
On the school buzz!
March 29th, 2008 by admin
March 29th, 2008 by admin
Patient: Doctor Doctor, I think I’m a pair of curtains
Doctor: Pull yourself together!
Patient: Doctor Doctor, My wife thinks I’m crazy!
Doctor: Would you like fries with that?
Patient: Doctor Doctor, There’s a bit of lettuce sticking out my bum!
Doctor: That’s only the tip of the iceberg.
Patient: Doctor doctor, I keep thinking I’m a cat.
Doctor: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Since I was a kitten.
Patient: Doctor doctor, I keep thinking I’m a tee pee and a marquee, whats wrong with me?
Doctor: You’re too tense…
March 29th, 2008 by admin
I went to the doctors yesterday and he told me I’m a paranoid schizophrenic. Well, he didn’t say it exactly, but we knew he was thinking it!
March 28th, 2008 by admin
March 28th, 2008 by admin
Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and isnt safe for children, and the other one carries groceries.
March 27th, 2008 by admin
March 27th, 2008 by admin
A blonde cop stops a blonde motorist and asks for her driver’s license.
The Motorist scuffles around in her purse and can’t find it. She says to the cop, “I must have left it at home officer.”
The cop says, “Well, do you have any kind of identification?” The motorist scuffles around in her purse again, and finds a pocket mirror.
She looks at it and says to the cop, “All I have is this picture of myself.” The cop says, “Let me see it, then.” So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, “Well, if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn’t have even pulled you over. You can go now.”
March 26th, 2008 by admin
